Self-image, for an African American women, is important for a number of reasons and on many different levels. Not only does society perpetuate the stereotype of Black women being loud and angry, but they also hyper-sexualize us to an astounding height. Black women are then forced to do one of two things, 1) express emotion and be labeled the Angry Black Woman™ or 2) be more socially reserved and have your peers call you the Whitest Black Girl they Know™. Both are not appealing and both are annoying.
Going by personal experience, it was very prominent to me when I was growing up that my identity was explicitly tied to my Blackness. “You talk White,” “You act White,” “You’re the Whitest Black girl I know.” Shit like that is not what anyone wants to hear. Suddenly, only White people can sound like they read books, only White people can be quiet and to themselves, and only White people can have interest outside the main stereotypes for Black people. That’s annoying, damaging, and completely not fair to all of the diverse Black children growing up. And the fact that our own people do that is even worse. The amount of times I got called Oreo, Black on the outside but White on the inside, is ridiculous. And when they found out I liked Kpop, peanut butter Oreo was the go to.
The most annoying.